Killing a Fly with a Ukulele: Running out of things to whine about

I am the Mum.
If life was a circus, I would be the plate-juggling lady with monkeys on her shoulders who stands on one leg on a horse's back as it canters around the ring.

I am the Writer.
I use too many commas, dashes and dot-dot-dots, and I often start sentences with conjunctions because I like my blog to look the way it sounds in my mind.

I am the Hero.
Life is a bit like a superhero action comic, except that the superheroes are tiny children dressed in super-suits who possess no actual powers, while I just get them food, break up fights and clean their super-suits.

01 December 2010

Running out of things to whine about

This poor little girl is running out of complaints. It must be a huge burden.

Today, after complaining about every possible thing under the sun ...

I'm tired
I don't like this TV show
I don't like these shoes
I don't want to go to this shop
Can I have this Barbie? Please?
Can I have this scooter? Please?
I don't like Doe-feff's crying
I'm hungry
etc...

... she came up with something new in the car on the way home. It was whined in exactly the same plaintive, pathetic tone without a hint of humour.

I've lost an eye!

I turned round in my seat and I saw this (faithfully re-created for the camera upon our return.)

It was shortly followed up with "I've lost my legs!" while sitting on the couch with her legs folded up tightly underneath her.

Poor little thing.

11 comments:

Hippomanic Jen said...: How can anyone be that gorgeous with her face screwed up that much?; 01 December, 2010 21:47
Andi said...: Did you just about die? With laughter of course.; 02 December, 2010 00:37
Unknown said...: It's getting tough around your place!!!; 02 December, 2010 05:22
♥ Boomer ♥ said...: Love it!!!; 02 December, 2010 07:38
Loony Lace Lady said...: What a lovely imagination she has, her brain must be constantly on the go.; 02 December, 2010 11:21
Caitlin said...: Cuteness! We've hit the whining stage in our house too, often accompanied by instant tears and howling. Driving me bananas. Wish he'd accompany his whining with something cute...; 02 December, 2010 19:49
Allegro ma non troppo said...: Oh dear! That's hilarious.; 02 December, 2010 20:24
Tracy P. said...: She is SO ADORABLE!! She will take wonderful care of you in your old age. Even once there is nothing more she can do, she will make you laugh.; 03 December, 2010 01:17
MUM said...: A budding actor with great imagination.; 03 December, 2010 21:33
Megan (Best of Fates) said...: That is so adorable - I think I might have to start saying that to people!; 04 December, 2010 00:05
Long dark hair, blue eyes said...: she is so cute!; 04 December, 2010 09:19

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This is the story of me, Givinya de Elba, and my adventures with Mr de Elba, my children Buzz, Jessie, and Woody and our dog, Bullseye. We have plenty of good times, some weird times and a huge dose of drama.

Some of my posts are sad, lots are funny and sometimes I subject you to my pondering. We have our celebrations, when I write a decent poem I share it with you and when I'm held hostage, I do the occasional meme.

Other people who are special to me feature here too, some of them being my Dad, my Mum, my Crazy Sister (her blog), my Wee Brother and my good friend Hippomanic Jen (her blog).

I am a part-time speech pathologist, and try to cook, keep a garden alive and take photos that don’t make us look like we are pharmaceutically affected or dangerously homicidal.

I often suffer from Mumfail but I keep hanging on to the One who picks me up when I fall. If you email me, I’ll answer.

And if all that is too much, just read my “Best Of."

No, they didn't.

They called me Katherine.

I go by Kate.

I came up with the pseudonym Givinya de Elba in highschool and it was based on a joke from an episode of Dad's Army called 'A Soldier's Farewell.'

In the episode, after eating too much toasted cheese, Captain Mainwaring dreams he is Napoleon at the Battle of Waterloo. I don't remember much about the episode other than Mainwaring telling his loyal men (Jones, Pike and Godfrey) that he has been exiled to the island of Elba.

Jones quips, "Hence the expression - Givin' ya the Elber!" (giving you the elbow, i.e., pushing you around.) I thought that Givinya de Elba was a half-decent pseudonym for someone who likes to joke and push people around, and I stuck with that.

My sweet niece ...

01 December 2010

Running out of things to whine about

11 comments: