Killing a Fly with a Ukulele: A Grim Task

I am the Mum.
If life was a circus, I would be the plate-juggling lady with monkeys on her shoulders who stands on one leg on a horse's back as it canters around the ring.

I am the Writer.
I use too many commas, dashes and dot-dot-dots, and I often start sentences with conjunctions because I like my blog to look the way it sounds in my mind.

I am the Hero.
Life is a bit like a superhero action comic, except that the superheroes are tiny children dressed in super-suits who possess no actual powers, while I just get them food, break up fights and clean their super-suits.

13 May 2010

A Grim Task

Tomorrow morning, I have a grim task to complete. I hesitate to write 'out loud' on my blog exactly what I plan to do, so I will use Google Image Search to find me a pictorial explanation of my proposed Friday Morning.

14 comments:

Cyndy Bush said...: You're going to stop and complain to the principal about the bad toilet?
I'm so confused! lol; 13 May, 2010 20:33
The Accidental Housewife said...: Good!! Stoopid crossing lady. A good flushing should sort her right out. Hmmpphhff!; 13 May, 2010 20:38
Allegro ma non troppo said...: That's it - give her a "Swirly"! And the "kill" gladiator sign.

Best luck!; 13 May, 2010 20:41
Emily Sue said...: If you're going to give her a Swirly will you please wait until I arrive? Because I'd like to take photos for my scrapbook.; 13 May, 2010 20:50
mamahasspoken said...: Oh I so didn't understand the toliet until the others told me. Please take pictures for us to see!; 13 May, 2010 21:00
Hippomanic Jen said...: All the best. Not an easy task, but, knowing you, it is a very necessary one.; 13 May, 2010 21:31
CynthiaK said...: Thank goodness a few others comment before I do because I also had no idea what the heck you were getting across until I read those.

Well, all I can say is, good luck and don't flush her too hard.; 13 May, 2010 21:33
Tracy P. said...: May you find an understanding ear on the other side of that door!; 13 May, 2010 22:34
Jen said...: I have no idea what you are talking about but good luck.; 13 May, 2010 22:57
John Ross Barnes said...: You're going to Stop giving complaints, go into the principal's office and Kill her/his Toilet!??!

well....ok. ;-{)>; 14 May, 2010 01:53
Emily Sue said...: Well? Well? Well?????; 14 May, 2010 12:42
G3 said...: peew-peew-peew! take that, school crossing lady!; 14 May, 2010 14:27
Anonymous said...: I glared at her this afternoon on the way home... That'll teach her! Hope it all went well... Waiting for the goss.... BB; 14 May, 2010 19:20
Allegro ma non troppo said...: Hopefully the toilet wasn't for you to puke in.; 14 May, 2010 21:37

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This is the story of me, Givinya de Elba, and my adventures with Mr de Elba, my children Buzz, Jessie, and Woody and our dog, Bullseye. We have plenty of good times, some weird times and a huge dose of drama.

Some of my posts are sad, lots are funny and sometimes I subject you to my pondering. We have our celebrations, when I write a decent poem I share it with you and when I'm held hostage, I do the occasional meme.

Other people who are special to me feature here too, some of them being my Dad, my Mum, my Crazy Sister (her blog), my Wee Brother and my good friend Hippomanic Jen (her blog).

I am a part-time speech pathologist, and try to cook, keep a garden alive and take photos that don’t make us look like we are pharmaceutically affected or dangerously homicidal.

I often suffer from Mumfail but I keep hanging on to the One who picks me up when I fall. If you email me, I’ll answer.

And if all that is too much, just read my “Best Of."

No, they didn't.

They called me Katherine.

I go by Kate.

I came up with the pseudonym Givinya de Elba in highschool and it was based on a joke from an episode of Dad's Army called 'A Soldier's Farewell.'

In the episode, after eating too much toasted cheese, Captain Mainwaring dreams he is Napoleon at the Battle of Waterloo. I don't remember much about the episode other than Mainwaring telling his loyal men (Jones, Pike and Godfrey) that he has been exiled to the island of Elba.

Jones quips, "Hence the expression - Givin' ya the Elber!" (giving you the elbow, i.e., pushing you around.) I thought that Givinya de Elba was a half-decent pseudonym for someone who likes to joke and push people around, and I stuck with that.

My sweet niece ...

13 May 2010

A Grim Task

14 comments: