Thingamababy

Thankyou all for your lovely comments of care and support over the recent weeks. I didn't know if I should actually tell you I was struggling, for fear of hearing you all say, "Get up. You sook."

I had one disappointing comment which I promptly deleted, but the poison remained and discouraged me from sharing anything for a while. But most of you do have a basic understanding of how people deal with grief and loss on many levels, and were able to support me as I worked through the feelings which were natural.

I thank God -literally- that I have many trusted and wise friends and mentors who have all echoed each other in allowing me to work through the stages of grief, all of which are still very confused and only partially completed. In the same day I still feel the initial denial, even though anger and acceptance have been vying for supremacy only hours before.

But enough. And now on to some other issues.

There is a third tiny de Elba on the way who will be called Thingamababy for the rest of his/her life unless a better name comes to mind. This is a much loved and prayed-for de Elba, but when Thingamababy was breathed into being, the new job and imminent move were nowhere on our horizon at all. In fact they didn't come screaming at us from left-field (for that's what they did) until a good 18-20 hours later. I

won't sugar-coat the nausea, exhaustion or stress, but I won't go into it either (not today anyway). Just imagine scraping yourself through a thick pall of desperation to vomit, the need to sleep so long until you're in danger of starvation, and managing blood-pressure problems while pregnant and moving.

We have a few tentative dates: move what we need into Temporary Accommodation in the week of 16 Feb, get removalists to pack, move and store the rest of our things later that week, clean the whole house around the same time, have everything ready for tenants to move in around 25 Feb and arrange a home to buy or rent in our new town before the baby comes, preferably in May or June. Any earlier would be a bonus.

It all seems rather surreal.

Is it real?