Killing a Fly with a Ukulele: Clown Vomit

I am the Mum.
If life was a circus, I would be the plate-juggling lady with monkeys on her shoulders who stands on one leg on a horse's back as it canters around the ring.

I am the Writer.
I use too many commas, dashes and dot-dot-dots, and I often start sentences with conjunctions because I like my blog to look the way it sounds in my mind.

I am the Hero.
Life is a bit like a superhero action comic, except that the superheroes are tiny children dressed in super-suits who possess no actual powers, while I just get them food, break up fights and clean their super-suits.

25 August 2012

Clown Vomit

It turns out that sometimes when you tell three-year-olds stuff, they believe it.

Explaining the first picture on the previous post and showing the real-life "clown vomit" created hilarity in Buzz and Jessie, but complete credulity in Woody. Clown vomit has been a huge topic of conversation ever since.

Woody seems convinced that the mess in the laundry tub was caused by a real clown, most possibly Clownie pictured below receiving TLC as he convalesces from a terrible case of gastro. Look at the poor thing, with his hand to his forehead.

Add to that the complication of Woody having noticed at the car wash today that the machines squirted colourful stuff all over the car. Now conversation is dominated by a giant clown vomiting on Terry.

Pity the poor Grandmother who has to wade through the clown vomit that is certain to dominate conversation at the next playdate. Should I warn the Grandmas or let the confusion begin?

4 comments:

gartcott aka Penny Hannah said...: More fun to hear how they deal with it I should think.; 25 August, 2012 18:03
Hippomanic Jen said...: Oh, let it surprise 'em.; 27 August, 2012 12:37
Cappy said...: 31 August, 2012 01:26
Givinya De Elba said...: Cappy left this comment and it's worth following the link! In my ham-fistedness I accidentally deleted Cappy's comment while stabbing wildly with one finger at the iPad while cuddling Timothy in the other arm - sorry Cappy!

Read this blog yesterday and stumbled across this today... LOL!

http://www.threadless.com/product/282/The_Morning_After/tab,guys/style,shirt; 31 August, 2012 16:37

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This is the story of me, Givinya de Elba, and my adventures with Mr de Elba, my children Buzz, Jessie, and Woody and our dog, Bullseye. We have plenty of good times, some weird times and a huge dose of drama.

Some of my posts are sad, lots are funny and sometimes I subject you to my pondering. We have our celebrations, when I write a decent poem I share it with you and when I'm held hostage, I do the occasional meme.

Other people who are special to me feature here too, some of them being my Dad, my Mum, my Crazy Sister (her blog), my Wee Brother and my good friend Hippomanic Jen (her blog).

I am a part-time speech pathologist, and try to cook, keep a garden alive and take photos that don’t make us look like we are pharmaceutically affected or dangerously homicidal.

I often suffer from Mumfail but I keep hanging on to the One who picks me up when I fall. If you email me, I’ll answer.

And if all that is too much, just read my “Best Of."

No, they didn't.

They called me Katherine.

I go by Kate.

I came up with the pseudonym Givinya de Elba in highschool and it was based on a joke from an episode of Dad's Army called 'A Soldier's Farewell.'

In the episode, after eating too much toasted cheese, Captain Mainwaring dreams he is Napoleon at the Battle of Waterloo. I don't remember much about the episode other than Mainwaring telling his loyal men (Jones, Pike and Godfrey) that he has been exiled to the island of Elba.

Jones quips, "Hence the expression - Givin' ya the Elber!" (giving you the elbow, i.e., pushing you around.) I thought that Givinya de Elba was a half-decent pseudonym for someone who likes to joke and push people around, and I stuck with that.

My sweet niece ...

25 August 2012

Clown Vomit

4 comments: