19 March 2011

Daydawn Muesli Bars and Disappearing Berlei Briefs

Sometimes, it pays to let a company know when their product doesn't come up to scratch.

When my sister was in high school, she and about a dozen of her friends were disenchanted with the new smaller size of the muesli bars produced by Uncle Toby's rival Daydawn.  On a spare page of her Science notebook, she wrote a kind note to Daydawn pointing out her disappointment and asked all her friends to sign it.  Daydawn thoughtfully sent her four boxes of six muesli bars each, all in very unusual flavours.

Inspired by her example, I have summoned courage to write to a company whose product's shortcomings should really be brought to their attention.

Dear Berlei,

I have always loved your products especially the black Berlei Curves Embroidery Wirefree bra, which is why, when I saw your ‘Barely There’ range of briefs, I had to give them a go.

They boasted ‘flat seams finished with velvet soft edging to help prevent ride-up’ which sounded great to me.  I was in need of new underwear, and knowing that Berlei was a great brand, I bought four pairs.

In the fitting rooms at Myer, they seemed like a great fit despite the constraints of not being able to actually walk around in them, and having the Barely Theres over the top of my regular briefs.

Outside the fitting rooms at Myer, the story changed.

The Australian Dental Association recommends regular flossing, but this was ridiculous.

Without the structure of elastic in the seams, the flat-seamed velvet-edged legs of my new Barely Theres were free to slide wherever they pleased, and settled on following the path of least resistance into places where only an involved Search and Rescue could find them.  And when you’re out in public, involved Search and Rescues are not quite the done thing.  Especially at work.
The effect was somewhat lessened with liberal application of moisturiser to the butt cheeks, but that’s an awful lot of moisturiser in my case.

Oh Berlei, can you offer me something to soften the disappointment in my large purchase of expensive disappearing briefs?  If nothing else, it’s costing me a fortune in moisturiser.

Givinya de Elba

Have you ever written to a company?  Have they assuaged your disappointment in their product?


Crazy Sister said...

Perhaps they'll send you some boxes of cherry flavoured yoghurt... briefs?

Givinya De Elba said...

Is that the muesli bar flavour they gave you? Odd.

No, I don't think they'll give me that sort of brief, because I don't think it's that sort of shop.

Hippomanic Jen said...

Thanks for the Saturday night giggle!

Tracy P. said...

Oh my goodness! That is fabulous. Well, not a fabulous situation, but a perfect informational letter to a company who cares about their product, we might assume.

I am a firm believer in letter writing, but it has been a long time. My mind instantly goes back to the time that I wrote to a well known youth evangelist who had a nationwide call-in program. He had promised that God had a wonderful husband in store for a girl who had been abused by some guy. I was a happy, fulfilled single person who could not abide his making a promise that was in no way his to make. He read my letter on the air the following week.

I have written many letters since then with positive responses, but my mind always goes back to that one.

sewfunbymonique said...

too funny, but what a bummer!!

Andi said...

I wrote to Levi's complaining on the poor quality of their clothing now...They sent me a 30% off coupon. Sadly, I was hoping for more!

Emily Sue said...

I do hope you actually sent that letter. Because as someone who worked in complaints for 8 years, I can assure you I would have loved to receive a witty letter like that, instead of the usual misspelled "Youse all suck!" tirade.

Hairline Fracture said...

"The Australian Dental Association recommends regular flossing, but this was ridiculous."

That has to be one of the best lines in a complaint letter EVER!

tinsenpup said...

I hope they read this and send you something useful (a crowbar maybe?).

It may shock you to learn that your promised package was posted today. I fear it's long awaited arrival is bound to be an anti-climax. I say we give them 24 hours then start complaining bitterly about Australia Post and their terrible slowness. What do you think? :)

B said...

I NEED to know - did you actually send it!!??

I write letters and emails to people all the time - there are some scary things in my email drafts - I hope no one ever hacks into my account and hits 'send'!!

If you did send it - please let us know if they send you something!


John Ross said...

Wow. um, okay. hope that works out for you. D'oh!

Even your bad purchases benefit your readers. thanks