11 October 2011

Ass. U. Me.

Scene One:  Buzz's classroom, Monday morning before Sports Day.

Me: Hi Jen!  Have you heard much about Sports Day?
Jen: Not much.  Hey, is Buzz in Evans House?
Me: Yeah, sure, he's in Evans.  And Elijah is too, isn't he?  I remember because we lent him a yellow shirt last year on Sports Day.
Jen: Oh, that's right, you did.  He's okay this year - he has a yellow shirt this time.
Me: Cool then.  Well, Go Evans, hey?
Jen: Yeah, Go Evans!  See you on Wednesday!


Scene Two:  In car, killing time after postponing a swim on finding the swimming pool full of older women doing aqua-aerobics.


Me, to self: Hmm, actually Buzz doesn't have a yellow shirt.  I wonder if I should get one before Wednesday.  I wonder which shirt he wore last year?  I can't even remember what he wore last year.  He must have had that old long-sleeved yellow shirt.  Huh.  Well I'd better pop in somewhere and buy him a new yellow shirt.


Scene Three:  Home

Me:  Hey guess what?
Mr de Elba: What?
Me: I was talking to Jen this morning about Sports Day and when I mentioned that I'd lent Elijah a yellow shirt last year, I realised that Buzz doesn't have one for this year.  So I just got this great yellow polo shirt for Buzz!  It was only $9.00!  Would it be funny or kitsch if I put lettering on the back with Buzz's name?  Glad I thought of it actually.  It would have been bad if we'd got to Wednesday morning and he didn't have a yellow shirt to wear, being in Evans House.
Mr de Elba:  Rudd.  Red.  Buzz is in Rudd House.

- pause -

Me: Uh, yeah.  So he is.  Rudd.


Moral:  Just because you lent someone a yellow shirt doesn't mean your own kid is in Evans.  Ass.  U.  Me.

9 comments:

Emily Sue said...

Heh. Once you have an assumption in your head it's very difficult to get it out.

Rudd House? Not named after Kevin, surely?

Givinya De Elba said...

Pre-Kevin, I believe!

Emily Sue said...

So which Rudd? Our houses in primary school were named after explorers, I think. Well, three of them were Blaxland, Wentworth and Flinders, but I seem to recall being in Macarthur house (yellow shirt with black writing). He was the Merino sheep guy, not an explorer. Still famous, but you'd think they could have called the other house Lawson or something.

Andi said...

That terminology confuses the heck out of me. I was assuming you were referring to sports teams, then decided it's a group in school...then decide I don't know what you are talking about.

But I assume all the time.

And it results in lots of me looking like an ass...

Emily Sue said...

Andi, generally all the students are sorted into four (or so) 'houses' for sport competition within the school. So at school sport carvinals you would represent your house when you compete, and wear the house colours. Kind of like Griffindor, Hufflepuff etc in Harry Potter, but mainly just for sport and sometimes fund-raising events and other intra-school stuff.

But when you're competing against another school, you just represent the school and not your individual house.

Dawn said...

Assume is dangerous fer sure.

Crazy Sister said...

The first sports day at our new school, I realised nobody had told me anything about the house system. You know what I did? I went along to sports day with my kid in his normal uniform, and I took a SHIRT OF EVERY COLOUR along! Every single darn coloured shirt we owned!

I found out he was supposed to be yellow (unlike Buzz, ha ha ha) and took out the yellow shirt to put on him.

"I don't like that shirt, I won't wear it," he said, and ran off to compete in his plain old uniform. Which, confusingly, is the same colour as one of the other houses.

I'd just ASSUMED he'd want to wear the right shirt... silly me.

B said...

Assumicide. The silent killer of any resemblance of presenting an aura of knowing what the heck you are supposed to be doing.

(Eat THAT Urban Dictionary!)

tinsenpup said...

If I related the drama that ensued last weekend (mostly in my head) over the logistics of a friend's child's birthday party you would almost certainly feel better, but it was sooo stupid that I can't bear to even think about it right now.