16 August 2010

Always Learning

As a parent, I'm always learning.

Today, for example, I learned that if your child moans loudly when you're in the deli section, "I need to do a wee" and then proceeds to repeat this all around the shop punctuating her moaning monologue with, "I'm holding my bottom so the wee doesn't come out," and "Oh no oh no I think I just did a little bit of wee in my undies," the best course of action is NOT to keep repeating, "Oh sweetheart, you did eleventy billion wees this morning and the last one was just before we came, so I think you're probably empty."

The best course of action in that situation is either to leave the trolley and head straight for the bathrooms or to bolt directly for the nappies section, rip open a box and whack one on her straight away.

See, I'm always learning.

11 comments:

  1. OH NO!

    Even parents have to learn the hard way sometimes. We're just bigger versions of them in the end.

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  2. I pick choice B. Because I would love to be a witness to that chaos.

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  3. Since I am knee deep in training Claire, I totally understand.

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  4. Oh yeah, and another one you've got to react quickly too might be anything along the lines of driving along a lovely winding, hilly road and hearing from the rear kid seat "Dad(or Mum), I don't feel so good..." Nothing puts a damper on a trip to the beach like driving the last 50 miles with the odour of kid ack wafting about the vehicle.

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  5. Oh dear. I am still learning this myself. Have you tried the new parents' room at K-Mart? I finally now have a reason to stop avoiding that shopping centre. Schmick!

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  6. I am trying not to be amused by your experience.

    Failing miserably.

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  7. Haaaa haaa haaaa! It must just be so much fun being you!!!

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  8. If only there were toilets INSIDE supermarkets. Life would be so different.

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  9. Oh goodness. Abandon all and head for the potty. Tell her I feel her pain though. I was in the mountains in Colorado last week and that is all I did. I guess the altitude had that affect on me. Tinkle Tinkle all the time.
    I could have used a nappy.
    ♥ Joy

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  10. You made me smile!

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Thanks for picking up a ukulele and taking a potshot!